The Proverbs 31 Ministries Podcast

Kaley Olson: Hi, friends. Thanks for tuning in to the Proverbs 31 Ministries podcast, where we share biblical truth for any girl in any season. I'm your host, Kayley Olson, and I'm here today with my co-host and my friend and the CEO, Meredith Brock, CEO of My Life in Proverbs. Oh, my goodness. But Meredith, you're gonna tell us what we're you're gonna tell our listeners what we're gonna hear today.

Meredith Brock: Yes. Wow. It is a really powerful teaching, you guys. We have a new friend on today. Her name is Jada Edwards, and she is talking all about agape love.

Kaley Olson: Yeah.

Meredith Brock: And how we have really misunderstood, incorrectly defined even, and put limits on God's love that was never supposed to be there.

Kaley Olson: Yeah.

Meredith Brock: And so, get ready, buckle up. It is a powerful teaching.

Kaley Olson: It really is a powerful teaching. And interestingly enough, I had a note in here in our announcements, like mention therapy and theology. Because it's been a while since we've talked about the Therapy and Theology podcast on the Proverbs 31 Ministries podcast, because, I mean, it's great content by Lisa TerKeurst and a trusted therapist, and our director of theology here, Joel Muddamalle. We used to run that content on the show, and then what we don't anymore, I was like, people probably might not know about it if they're just now listening to this. But here's the thing about therapy and theology.

I love this podcast so much because I know for a fact it's helping people. And in a world where people are seeking out therapy, but either one, can't afford it, or two, can't get in to see a counselor fast enough, the show is truly meeting people in their greatest needs. But today on the show, if we're talking about agape love and how to love well, we talk a little bit about, like, well, how do you do you love somebody even if it's dangerous? Or, like, we talk about that, but not really how to know. Yeah.

Like, what to do with that. And so that's where therapy and theology comes in because the Proverbs podcast, we're talking about like biblical principles and giving teachings and things like that. Therapy and theology is where you can go when you're like, I need boundaries, but I don't know what to do. Yeah. Or I've got these red flags in my life, and what do I do?

Or I'm sensing this, and I don't know, like, how I should process or feel about this. Therapy and theology is the podcast for you. And so you can listen to that podcast by searching therapy and theology on any podcast platform, or you can go to the Proverbs Studio Ministries YouTube channel, where you can watch all of the therapy and theology episodes. And wherever you choose to listen or watch on a podcast platform or on YouTube, I really highly encourage you to subscribe so you never miss a future episode.

Meredith Brock: Alright, friends, let's dive into today's teaching with Jada.

Kaley Olson: Well, we are so excited to welcome our friend Jada Edwards to the show today. Welcome, Jada.

Jada Edwards: Thank you for having me. Glad to be here.

Meredith Brock: Jada is new to the podcast. So, before we get into her teaching, allow me to tell you a little bit about her. Jada is a wife and a mom who is passionate about equipping women of all ages and stages of life with practical biblical truths designed to help them live authentic and transparent lives. She does this through her role on staff as the creative services director at One Community Church, which she planted with her husband in 02/2008. That's awesome. And she's here today to share a message from her newest book titled A New Way to Love Your Neighbor, Be Curious, Free, and Brave, How to Transform Your Relationship with God and Others.

Jada, girl, you have got a lot going on. She's a mom, she's a wife, she's a pastor's wife, she's a creative service director. And now she's gonna teach. She's an author and now she's teaching. Girl, we cannot wait to hear what the Lord has put on your heart.

So why don't you take it away, my friend.

Jada Edwards: Man, I'm so glad to be here. I'm so glad to be able to join you guys today. This has really been, a labor of love, like most books are for authors. But I think this journey has been really personal for me.

When I first really felt inspired to write this book, it had to be probably near the end of COVID. And a couple of things really triggered that. It was watching what was happening in the social media spaces because that's all we had, and we just were obsessed with social media. All of a sudden everybody had a voice. There were a lot of divisive things happening politically, socially, especially with the handling of the pandemic.

And I just found it interesting how a lot of, churches, quote unquote influencers, Christian leaders, how they were navigating that space. And I remember, those times of going to the comments of somebody's post, you know, they could post about anything, and it would just create a firestorm. And I would look at some of the comments in the way we were talking to each other. I kind of felt like civility and, you know, those things were out of the window. If you if you did not agree with me, then, you know, you got to be banished.

Like, you cannot be in my space. And then what was more interesting is that I would look at some of the profiles with the people making comments and they would be like, you know, daughter of the king, son of God. And I was like, really? Are we really which king? Because the way we are talking to each other in these spaces, and I really think that it was the church, the global church did not really lead that space well, because the church itself was caught up in a lot of polarizing discussions and opinions that just are not going to matter in eternity.

And so that was happening. And then even in my own life, I remember this moment of asking the Lord, you know, to fix my husband and change my marriage and make things better, which, you know, any good wife, that's what should be praying. Ask Lord to fix your husband. That's the biblical prayer. And so, I'm kidding.

But I was praying like, Lord, fix my husband, like we often do, fix everybody with me. And that was a personal moment of revelation where I really felt the Lord just kind of challenging me in my spirit saying, you have a love problem. You have a love problem. And I was like, no, no, no, those people out there in those comment sections, they have a love problem. They're not kind.

And the Lord was like, yeah, you may not be as unkind in the comments, but in this moment, you really love what you want me to do in your marriage more than you love me right now. You're loving what I can do or what I can produce more than me. And here's what love here's what I'm calling you to, Jada. I want you to love me with your heart, soul, mind, and strength. And if you love me first, if I'm the anchor, if everything comes out of my love for you and your love for me, then everything from appropriate comments to how you navigate marriage, to how you deal with loss, to how you deal with anxiety, all of that will be, the fruit of what it really means to love me well.

And it just kind of shook me because I would not really define myself as a loving person. Because when we say someone is loving, we think typically kindness, compassion, generosity, and those are good descriptors, but they are not the complete definition. They are incomplete when it comes to describing the love that God has called us to. And so, during this whole process, I was led to a really fundamental passage, fundamental to our faith and that is the great commandment. And I like the Mark version, the Mark 12 version, because Mark says when he's quoting what Jesus responds, with he says, and you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul and with all your mind.

And Mark says with all your strength. His version adds strength. And then, of course, the second commandment is like this, you shall love your neighbor as yourself. And I mean, if I grew up in church, I was a church kid. So that that scripture along with probably John three sixteen and twenty third Psalm, I felt like I was learning those in VBS from, you know, the age of three.

Jada Edwards: But even if you didn't grow up in church, you've probably heard that, love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. Love your neighbor as yourself. And I really started to ask Lord what is it that I'm missing because I am gonna try to be nicer. I'm gonna try to be kinder to my husband or more gentle with my kids or more, compassionate toward my friends or whatever the case may be. And it really started this whole journey that I never could have anticipated, which really started with God challenging me on how I have limited his idea of love.

He was like, let me let me show you, what agape love really is or what agape is, what agape, the verb form, what I when I'm asking you to love when I'm asking you to agape, what does that really mean? And that began to really reveal so many layers to what God has already given us in his perfect love, and to bring clarity to what he then expects from us as recipients of that love. And so, the idea that agape is, is a choice, it's not a response. So that was the first thing that that really threw me. Agape is not a response, which means it's independent of someone else's words or someone else's behavior or someone else's ability to make you happy or disappoint you.

It's just a choice. It's not motivated by any kind of superficial appearance or emotional attraction. It's not motivated by sentimental relationship. It chooses as an act of self-sacrifice to serve the recipient. Agape says, I am going to serve you by my choice, not because you've earned it or deserve it.

And it may involve emotion because there's often affection, involved in agape or divine love, but it's not driven by the emotion. So, this is not something that's relationally driven. It's willfully driven. And when I when I started really studying what that looked like through scripture, it really just kept blowing my mind. Even watching how God's own love had had had unfolded in its revelation throughout the scriptures.

Not that God's love had changed. It's always been perfect and complete since eternity past, but the way he chose to reveal it in humanity evolved. So in the Old Testament, you mostly see, Hesed love or a Haab love. These are loves related to relationship. Hesed love was really significant between God and his people.

This was a covenantal love, a love that came out of loyalty. God had many expectations of his people in the Old Testament to honor, serve, to offer regular sacrifice to him, to follow him, to obey him. And that tested love was the love that God gave his people out of a covenant relationship. And then you start to when you go to the New Testament, especially knowing a little bit of Old Testament history that God was very, very particular as to who could be a part of his people. His plan in the Old Testament was to represent himself, reveal himself through a chosen group of people.

And so there are many stipulations about how they interact with foreigners and who could be a part of them, who could be among them, which then in turn meant there was a limited group of people who could feel God's covenant to love because he gave a broad general love to the world, but there was a special love for his people. And then you get to the New Testament, John three sixteen, For God so agape the world, for God so loved the world. It, that is why the, the Pharisees and scribes and people who were stuck in that generational, way of thinking that had been so steeped in tradition that had been all they known. That's why this idea of God loving the world, you loving God with your heart and then love your neighbor as yourself. This was a paradigm shift.

So now this is not just love reserved between God and his chosen people or those who are in covenant with him. And now this is not just love about between two people in relationship. God is saying I love the whole world. And how did he demonstrate that I gave my son, I didn't give my son as a reward. I didn't give my son after you decide to follow me.

I gave my son first. Agape makes the first move. Agape makes the first sacrifice that God would give his son to the world just so they might so they would have an opportunity to choose to believe will blow your mind if you sit with that for a minute, because who among us gives the highest sacrifice just so you might have a chance to accept it. If I'm sacrificing, I want some reasonable certainty, some assurance that you are going to appreciate that, that you're going to respond to that maybe even reciprocate it. And that that's just my human level sacrifice to be inconvenienced to loan somebody money or to share my home with someone or whatever the case may be, whatever we may call a sacrifice, it is inherent in us to want something in return, even a thank you.

And for God to give this level of sacrifice for the whole world so that anybody could just decide to believe in the perfect work in life of Christ really shows how he chose to reveal his love to mankind differently. And that is the love he's calling us to. He's calling us to this, this unconditional initiating sacrificial love without any assurance that someone may respond or appreciate it or reciprocate it. And how can we do that? Well, because we're first anchored in that love that he has given to us.

So, a big part of this journey was redefining what I called love. And he and the Lord really challenged me in my study to say, you've got to elevate this idea of love. This is not just kindness. This is not just controlling your temper or, you know, being in a good mood. This is so much deeper, because sometimes the most loving things that we do don't are not attached to joyful emotions.

Sometimes it's the discipline that we have to give a child or the know that we have to say to someone or walking with someone through a really hard valley. It's loving and it might not feel joyful, but that's the sacrificial, initiating love that God has called us to. So, a big part of this work was, in the in the first portion of this work, this book is about understanding how we limit that love, how we either use it casually because we love pizza, we love our pets, we love people. We either use it use it too casually or we limit it to our own experiences. And so, I talk a lot about the work that we really need to do to think about how our lives have shaped our idea of love.

Most we have, we are used to transactional love, you do for me, I do for you, reciprocal love, conditional love. I mean, even with our children who we probably love the purest, that we can as humans, even with that, I mean, how many how many times do we know of a child making a certain decision at some point in their life and it creating a deep disappointment in their parent, a deep disappointment? And we might not say I'm gonna stop loving you, but man, a child can certainly do something at a point in their lives that can affect our ability to really engage with them. You know, they make really unwise decisions or do something that make us say, how could you do that after I've loved you or after I've given this to you? That's because something in us kind of always has some conditions attached to our love.

Man, no matter how hard we try, it's just attached to something. I think about how I love an infant, how we love a newborn, even versus, an adult child or a middle school child, help us all if you have middle school children or a high school child or college child, that love, we may not want to admit it, but it kind of evolves a little bit because we start to say once you know better, we expect better. And you might not withhold dinner and provision and things like that, but it can affect your relationship. Now that baby that, has dirty diapers and vomits on you without warning and keeps you up all night, you just know this is what it is. This, this baby can only do so much.

I, it needs me. And so, our love at that point is probably in one of the best states it can be in, in humankind. But that love for a baby where we have no expectation is so different than the way we love our college age child or our 30-year-old child. They can make decisions that deeply hurt us. And we're not so quick to forgive depending on what those are.

And that's just a small example of how our love tends to have some kind of condition. So, the Lord really challenged me to check my own heart. What has my life been? Was it my experiences with my father? Those things significantly shaped the way we view God.

Was your father present? Was he absent? Was he a punisher? Did he expect high performance? Was he unforgiving?

All of those little things begin to affect my ability to fully receive God's love, and I certainly cannot give to another what I have not received from God. So that work is important. It's the spirit of Psalm 139 where, David opens that Psalm, really declaring how well the Lord knows him, that you've searched me, you know me when I sit down, when I rise up, you know, a thought before it's even formed, on my lips. And then he ends that Psalm, the end of Psalm 139, saying, Lord, search me and show me. And so, David is not asking God to search him because God doesn't know.

He's already established that the Lord knows him. He's saying, show me me. Lord, you know me better than I know myself. I've already established how well you know me. Now will you show me?

And will you search my own heart so that I can be pleasing to you? Take out anything that's not like you. And so, you know, before self-care and popular therapy became a thing, the Lord has always been asking us to invite him to search us. He said, this is this is how you will know yourself and in therapy and counselors are awesome. I love mine.

Jada Edwards: And self-help books are great, and community is great. Those things are all supplemental. The core is a constant invitation of Lord, search me, show me because the Lord will show you what your hidden motives are. The Lord will show you that you're still carrying some pain from your mother or from your father or from that person that hurt you, a friend or for from someone who betrayed you. The Lord will show you how those things are beginning to impact your ability to receive his love and to offer his love to others.

Like, only God can speak to us about the nuance of our own life. We can all hear the same sermon, and the application is gonna look very different depending on the lives we've lived. And the Holy Spirit is the one that says, hey. This is what I want you to do with that. Here's what I want you to start dealing with or forgiveness that you need to walk through.

So many things. So redefining love in our from our limits and our experiences, asking God to really search us so that we can start to see the difference between the way we've approached love and the way God has asked us to love. And then lastly, after, you know and these are these are often parallel journeys. It's not like, oh, God, search me. Show me everything.

And God dumps the truck, to you about you. And you're like, great. I'll just work through this list for the rest of my life. That is typically not how it happens. God is gracious, and he will even only show you about you what you can handle.

He's like, girl, I'm not gonna dump the truck. Thank you, Lord, for that. He will just say, let's lean into this for a season. And right when you think, you know what? I'm doing pretty good.

He'll go, wait. Hold on. We have more. I was just giving you some bite sized approach, a bite sized approach. And so, it's a journey.

It's ongoing. God's constantly asking God to search me and asking God to show me, like, how do I live this out every day? Because man, if you approach it from behavior, you will just be frustrated, and it won't be genuine. So, you know, you can say, let me start with the fruit of the spirit, but that's the fruit of the spirit is not a checklist. The fruit of the spirit is evidence of what it means when a person is walking in the spirit, not the flesh.

You don't start with let me be loving, let me be kind, let me pursue peace, let me have patience. No, you start with walk in the spirit, walk in the spirit because the spirit is gonna guide us in agape. The spirit is gonna say this is divine love and the fruit of the spirit, what we see in Galatians five is our, it's our measure, it's our evidence to say if I'm walking in the spirit, this is what my life should look like. Or when I exhibit love and I'm not in a good mood or when I exhibit peace. And even though there's chaos around me and everything in me wants to feed the chaos, but when I'm able to have tranquility or invite others into tranquility and I know it's not my personality, that's the fruit of the spirit.

Jada Edwards: So, it's not that I'm pursuing a certain behavior, I'm pursuing a walk and then watching how that shows up in my life. So, you know, asking God to search us and to show us, searching and showing. And that that is an ongoing cycle because the Lord will show you deep things about forgiveness and pain and even resentment or bitterness, we may have toward God because of things he allowed in our lives, how our how our experiences affect the way we view him. And then he will patiently and perfectly show us how to live that out. Like, he can bring us into that place of healing and saying, look, look in these small things, like, the reason why this person rubs you wrong or the reason why, you know, you weren't invited to this thing and you found out about it, the reason why it hurt your feelings so badly is not because that friend, it's not because their friend didn't love you and it's not because, they betrayed you.

That's your friend. This hurt you because you've always struggled with not being invited or anytime, you're not included, it touches on a rejection wound that you haven't dealt with. And if you haven't dealt with your rejection wound, then guess what? You can't celebrate with your friend because you're still mad that you weren't invited. Like, it's these small little things.

They seem so small, but they become threads that pull on a larger, a larger pain that's usually happening in our hearts and it really affects the way we love. And so, this whole thing has been so enlightening for me, refreshing, challenging and I continue to be blown away by the fact that no matter what I learn about myself, when I'm trying to deal with things in my own heart, I keep being blown away by the fact that God already knew it. He already knew it. He's already still called me and favored me and given me his love, and he's like, you're not gonna learn anything about yourself that I don't already know. And remember, I love first, so you're not gonna learn anything about yourself that's gonna affect the way I love you.

It's gonna affect the way I bless you. It's gonna affect my presence. Like, it's the best way to learn. It's the safest environment to grow, and that is in in the love of God because it doesn't change. And so, this invitation for God to search me is not gonna lead to shame, or guilt because there's therefore not no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus.

It is gonna lead to eyes open and an ability to love others well. And let me tell you, when you start getting glimpses of the Holy Spirit loving through you and you know that was not my idea, I would not have known to send that text. I would not have remembered to check on this person whose fathers in the hospital. I was about to ask them something else, and the Holy Spirit is like, hey. Before you do that, remember the last time they talked to you, they told you about their dad.

Once you asked that question first, then you asked that question, they're like, oh my gosh. Thanks for checking on me. And in my mind, I'm like, it was not me. It was the Holy Spirit because I'm continuing to open myself up to love well. And he's those were miracles, by the way.

It is not just the parting of the Red Sea. When the Lord gives you a revelation that speaks to the heart of someone, brings a comfort, reminds that person of God's presence. That's a miracle that God is saying. I could have done this directly for that person, but I'm gonna do it through you. I want you to love your neighbor the way I've loved you.

Jada Edwards: And so, it's just such an overwhelming privilege to be a recipient of God's love and to know that he's entrusted us, the believer, to reciprocate that love to others. And that's really the heart of the book.

Kaley Olson: Yeah. Man, that's so good, Jada. I, as you were talking about God's agape love and how we need to pursue the walk and not the behavior, I was right reminded of something that Meredith's pastor said one time about how, like, when God said go and sin no more, he knew that we would never be able to actually do that.

And I think love, like what you talked about today is so connected to that, because God chooses to love us despite our sin, and wants us to be able to imperfectly do that for other people, but out of our heart and not of, out of a behavior choice. Like, we can never fix our behavior enough to fix our heart. But I, I wanna ask you a question that you kind of started alluding to. At the end of your teaching, and you talked about how like God is, God can do things through you that he would do by himself, but he chooses to use you so that you can kind of see how he's like wanting to work through you. And this might, I'm asking you to get a little bit vulnerable here.

I know we've only known each other for about forty minutes now, but since we've been friends for that long. I do wanna know, you mentioned this looks different for everybody, but when you committed to living a life of agape love, what are some of the things that God asked you to do that you might not have expected to look like love if you hadn't known otherwise? Like specific to you, what did he ask you to do? If you feel comfortable sharing a few things, I think that would be really helpful for our listeners to see this in action in your own life.

Jada Edwards: Yeah. There's a couple of examples I think about. One and these they seem so small until I'm like, oh, that's the Lord. I remember I was working with a team and we were setting up for a conference at church and it was long, long rehearsal days and I remember thinking, oh, I'm gonna, when we're done with this, I'm gonna have like a lunch for my team because I'm a social person, so I love a gathering, let's meet at a good restaurant, let's eat, let's connect, and so I was planning this whole thing in my head about how I was gonna just, you know, treat them to lunch, we're gonna have a great event, it's gonna be so fun. And I remember the Lord, it was so clear, He was like, go get them lunch now because it had been a long day. And I was like, I mean, I could, but I could plan an event, Lord.

In two weeks, it's gonna be great. I wanna plan an event. And it was like a strange kind of pressing where he's like, go get the people food now. And so, the whole team was running around doing their thing and I remember just saying, okay fine, I'm gonna slip out, went and got some sandwiches for everybody. And I came back, and I didn't say anything and probably about thirty minutes later, we'd been there several hours, someone said, oh my gosh, is there food?

Did we not remember to get food for this, this long rehearsal day? And I was like, Oh, there's food in the green room. There's food in the back. And everybody was like, oh my gosh, Thank God. And they went back there and I'm telling you in a matter of minutes, people, like, ravaged those little sandwiches.

And then for the rest of the evening, people were coming by and grazing on stuff. And they're like, oh man. Okay. We got our second one. We're ready to go.

And it seemed like such a small thing and I just, the Lord was like, see, see, like the event would have pleased you and you would have liked it, but the need, kindness, kindness, the fruit of the spirit is looking for a way to meet a need before someone asks. That's the evidence of my Agape. So do this thing. It's not going to be fancy. It's not going to be the way you want it, but it's going to meet their need in this moment and I'm using you to refresh them, recharge them.

And so, these kinds of things keep happening when I'm really open to the Lord loving through me and they, I'm surprised how they're not always grand gestures. It is just the small getting out of my way, the way I want to do it and thinking how God would love us, how would God would refresh, refresh these people, being open to what he's saying. And even the example I gave about the text, that's real, that happened to me. Had somebody on my team I was about to ask them for some things that they needed to get me, because I can be very task driven and I was literally about to hit send. They had the text typed up, hey don't forget to send me that and the Lord was like, wait a minute, the last time you talked to this person, they just told you their dad was diagnosed with this and he's in the hospital.

I was like, oh my God, delete, delete, delete, delete. Hey, how's your dad? That's what that text was, and I knew I needed to ask for those things, but not then and I'm telling you that person's response, I mean, it just was overwhelming and I knew it was because I got out of myself for a moment and didn't worry about me performing and getting all my stuff done, just asked a question because the Holy Spirit was like, there's something more important than what you're about to say right now. I need you to show compassion. It's those small things that just keep happening. Y'all keep pleasing me.

Kaley Olson: And slowing down, like, it's an invitation for us to really embrace, like, seeing people and not just being so task oriented.

Meredith Brock: That's Yeah. Absolutely. I love this teaching so much, Jada, because I think all true-life change, like being change, and not just behavioral modification, but like soul change starts with truly a perspective shift.

And a change in the way that we think about something. And I grew up hearing a lot. My dad was an alcoholic and so we Alcoholics Anonymous was very much part of our life at certain stages when he was not actively in his addiction. And so, there was the saying all the time of, like, love is a choice, love is a choice, and so I've heard that a lot because of where I grew up with. But you said something that, man, I was like, wow, I've never thought about it that way before.

And I think oftentimes I've because I've heard that phrase, love is a choice, it felt very behavioral like modification. Mhmm. But you said something that in defining agape, you said, Agape makes the first move. And immediately, I was like, man, to go first, to love first without promise of reciprocation at all is wildly vulnerable. Wildly vulnerable.

Jada Edwards: It's wild.
Meredith Brock: And scary. Yeah. And putting yourself in this position to be so deeply wounded. Now, God did that. And I don't think about our God as wildly vulnerable. Mhmm. I just don't. I think about him as strong.

Mhmm. Right. Right. Capable, unmovable. And then to reflect on his willingness to go first, to love first with no promise of ever receiving any kind of reciprocation, to have that perspective shift in your heart and, in your mind first, it changes who God is and when you see God differently, you see yourself differently.

You know? And then when you see yourself differently, you can respond to those moments, Jada, where it's like, okay, go get sandwiches. For real? I don't got time to get sandwiches right now. That's like ridiculous.

We've got to get this done. I'm not, you know, but when you see yourself as loved so deeply, he went first. Mhmm. Of course you'd go get the sandwiches.

Jada Edwards: Absolutely. And here's the thing about it, if no one had said thank you,

Meredith Brock: yeah, right. Oh, darn. Girl. It's yawn. Right.

Jada Edwards: It's like, you know, it's so unnatural. Yep. It's so illogical, it so goes against the grain of how we function as humans that it has to be divine. Absolutely. If our culture says what?

They did this to you. Get them back or cut them off. And God is like, oh, okay. Are we cutting people off now? Because do you want me to cut you off?

Right. And you just like, if you really think about how God loves us and there is a personal aspect to it that makes us if you gotta get past the, oh, he's a big, huge, omnipotent, omnipresent, omniscient God. He is that, but he's also a savior that did not want that cup. That's right. This is not like, this is easy.

Let me show you how to do it. No. There are ways, there's not times, many times, we're gonna be called to love and it's not the way we want it. Yet we have a perfect savior who knew how it was gonna work out and still did not want that cup and was like, you know what? I know I know I can see the end of this, but still, if there's another way.

Because and he knew there was not gonna be another way, but it was so we could see the humanity of how difficult it is to love well. That was out of obedience so that we could have John three sixteen. Yeah. Like and even in that vulnerable state, if you look at the disappointment of those closest to him, he's like you couldn't even stay awake. Yeah.

I'm not even asking you to go to the cross, just pray with me. Right. And how Jesus responds to them, even loving them in that moment, not I'm gonna unfringe you and block you and cancel you and kick you out of the garden. Mhmm. I'm gonna give you chance after chance after chance after chance because this is my love in action.

Right. And it is so scary. If you're not a little scared the way God is asking us to love, then you're probably not doing it right. And I don't want that to be I don't wanna confuse that with toxic or dysfunctional relationships. Right.

Because when you're led by the Holy Spirit, he will show you Yep. How to love and be safe. Yep. And how to love and be wise. He will show you how to do that.

And so, I'm not saying stay in unhealthy toxic things. I'm saying very often we discount any possibility of being humiliated or embarrassed or not having our love reciprocated because it just does not feel good. Right. And that is the exact love that Jesus demonstrated for us. Yeah.

Meredith Brock: And then to know, Jada, to your point, I just think Jesus knew he was gonna go to the cross. He knew what stood, like what he was about to go through, and he knew that the people he loved the most, that he was doing this for, would wound him the deepest. You know? And he said, no, but I will go. I will go first because there is no limit to my love.

There is no reciprocation that has to happen here. I will, I choose this. There's no contingency plan. And I think when you begin to really grasp that as a person in the deepest parts of your soul, it changes, quite honestly, everything. It changes your ability to engage with another person without the hope for a payment.

You know? I'm done. It's good. Goodness, Jada. It will in the best kind of way.

Kaley Olson: I know. Yeah.

Jada Edwards: It really will and it'll show up in small things and also big things and that's why we've seen marriages be restored even when there was infidelity and friendships be restored even when there was deep betrayal or hurt. Yeah. And we've seen parents come restore with their kids even when the kids made horrible decisions.

I'm talking about adult, you know, horrible decisions or we've seen that's why I want that's why someone can forgive their parent that's not even alive anymore for what they went through because when the when the when the fullness of God's love really sits in your soul Yeah. Then you realize there's not something that someone can do to me on this earth that can shake my soul. It might disappoint me deeply. Mhmm. It might create deep sadness.

It all those emotions. They didn't change my soul because that's anchored in the love of God. And so, it's a very protecting love. He's like, you can love this way because I love you this way. Yeah.

Mhmm. It's just, yeah, you can love freely,
Meredith Brock: and you can be wounded. And you can be wounded. For the sake of someone. And you can still love with him.

Jada Edwards: And for the sake of somebody that's right.

Meredith Brock: And that wounding won't be the end of you. No. Absolutely. Nope.

Kaley Olson: And if Jesus never did another thing for us, he's done enough for us to say thank you every single day. But he continues to say thank you. And I just think for all those times that we want to hear thank you, what if we just thanked God instead? And started like directing that attention, because I think, Jada, it's cool to wake up and ask God, what do you wanna do through me? But how often do I just go through my day and not notice all the little things that I really have to be grateful for?

And so, this has just been such a helpful teaching. At the end, I do, I wanna make a few announcements, but I wanna give you, Jada, an opportunity to just pray for our listeners because I think this is a very hard message to process. What do I do next? Yeah. God, what do you wanna do through me?

So, I'm gonna make some announcements, and then I'm gonna ask you to pray and then we'll close. So, first, guys, go purchase Jada's book. This is, again, it's titled A New Way to Love Your Neighbor. We've linked it for you in the show notes. I think it'll be a really helpful book.

This is such a fresh perspective on, what love really means. I, wanna go dig into it. And then next, go follow Jada on Instagram at Jada underscore Edwards. We've linked a couple of other things for you in the show notes, so be sure and go do that. But Jada, why don't you close us in prayer?

Jada Edwards: Absolutely. Lord, thank you so much for your love. Thank you for your grace. Thank you for how you have demonstrated a love that we probably will never fully understand because we're created limited beings. But thank you, God, for just this impeccable standard of grace and, taking the initiative and removing conditions.

And I pray, Lord, for anyone who might be listening, who is really having a hard time processing some of this, that you would first, invite them to be, on a healing path to fully receive your love because we cannot offer what we have not received. Sometimes that is our greatest barrier, Lord, that we have only received your love, partially because we have experiences and ideas that that impact the way we interact with you. So, Lord, wherever there's hurt, or wounds, will you just bring that healing so that every person listening can feel what it's like to walk in the fullness, the coverage, the protection of your love. And then that you would graciously and slowly at the right pace move us through what it means to grow in this. Give us the courage to invite you to search us.

Give us the faith to respond to what you say. And you you're so perfect and kind and patient. You will show us step by step, what to do in our day to day lives so that we can represent you better and love well. Will you show us the new way to love our neighbor, Lord? In Jesus' name, amen.

Meredith Brock: Amen. Amen. Amen. Jada, thank you so much for being here today. And all of our listeners, this is what we have.

This is it for the day. At Proverbs thirty-one Ministries, we believe when you know the truth and live the truth, it changes everything.